| My girlfriend called earlier tonight. This was said:
Casey: “You’ll never guess what happened today.”
Me: “Likely.”
Casey: “Yeah. So you know how the art gallery is super old — kay. So today I find this stash of binders in a drawer, and I don’t know who put them there or why since if I wanted a binder at any time, I would just walk across to the supply room and get one.
So I take out the binders so I can have more drawer space and when I try closing the drawer I notice something is jammed, but I can’t tell what it is cuz it’s in too deep. So I get a ruler to try and dislodge whatever it is and I’m trying to lift but it’s too heavy. And I’m poking it and it’s soft. It’s soft!
So then I start thinking: I remember people talking about how the building has been here longer than most generations of families and with something that old, that could mean rats! Dead ones!
I’m uneasy and go to this lady, Dalvinder, in admin–I think that’s what she does–who’s like this mother figure at the office. So she comes in and…
Dalvinder: “Don’t you worry, Casey. Don’t worry. I’m here now.” She looks around. Everything looks fine to her.
“You know, you’re just like my daughter. Well I’ve been a mother a long time and this stuff doesn’t bother me one bit.”
She walks over to the phone and dials.
“Hello, Security. Yes. Well you see, Casey seems to be in a bit of danger up here. Can someone come to the second f–.”
Casey: Grabs the phone. (Nervously) “Haha! April Fool’s! Just kidding! Everything’s fine! Hehe…” Puts the receiver down, pets it speaking to it. “There there…”
Dalvinder: “It’s August.”
Casey: Makes a face.
Dalvinder: “Well, let’s have a look here then if you’re going to be like this.”
Casey: Stands for two seconds. “I’m leaving.”
Dalvinder: “You know…You’ll never conquer your fears unle–
Casey: “I’M LEAVING!” Plugs ears and walks out.
Some clamour.
Dalvinder: “Casey, you can come back, my dear.”
Casey: Peeks around the doorway. “Is it safe?”
Dalvinder: “Why would I say you can come back if there was danger?”
Casey: makes a face.
Dalvinder raises something from behind the desk.
Casey squints. Turns face downward and to the the right. Slowly reopens left eye and turns cheek back slowly. Reopens right eye.
It is revealed: an old towel.
How it came to be there: a mystery.
What this ending probably is: anti-climatic. It was for me too.
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